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A Word to Parents and Families

I am sick! Maybe as a therapist I am not supposed to speak that way, but I am sick at heart. I am disgusted, angry, and just plain upset. Today I had watched one of my patients being killed by his family. I can not tell you the exact date of his death, but their cowardice signed his death warrant.

Using typical terrorist tactics, this patient threatened, cajoled and bullied his family into sending him a ticket home prior to the completion of treatment. He is going home to his apartment, his old friends and old habits with the promise, "I will not use again". This was his third time in rehab. This, his parents told him once again, is the last time that they were going to fund treatment. The fact that they had told him that time and time again is immaterial. They are still expecting to do the same thing and receive different results. The definition of this behavior is "insanity".

Let me be blunt. When a child is little and steps into the street we spank his bottom. We do this not because we want to hurt the child and/or that we are brutal people. We do it because we as parents recognize that the natural consequences of the child's behavior will be far worse than the spank on the bottom. The same applies to forcing a person to stay in treatment, regardless of their threats and pleading. It is far easier (spelled selfish) to give into demands than to give the person what they need, even if they don't want it.

If these comments offend you, I apologize. On the other hand I would hope that you would prefer to have the person angry at you for a few days than be angry at yourself for the rest of your life.

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Mitchell E. Wallick
Ph.D., CAP, CMHP, ICADC, CAGC, FABFCE
Aimee Wallick
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Susan Naversen
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BA
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